Picture this: You’re a 16-year-old footballer standing on the sideline, heart racing, palms sweaty, waiting to take that crucial penalty kick in the grand final. Your mind is flooded with thoughts: “What if I miss? Everyone’s watching. I can’t stuff this up.” Sound familiar? Welcome to the world where most young Australian athletes find themselves: battling their own minds as much as their opponents.

In our fourth instalment of the ACT series, we’re diving deep into acceptance: arguably the most misunderstood yet powerful component of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in sport. After 30 years working with elite and developing athletes across Australia, I’ve seen countless talented young people sabotage their performance by fighting internal battles they simply cannot win.

The Mental Tug-of-War That’s Costing Athletes

Most young athletes approach uncomfortable thoughts and feelings like they would a physical opponent: something to defeat, eliminate, or overpower. They spend enormous energy trying to suppress pre-game nerves, silence critical inner voices, or force themselves to feel confident. This creates what we call experiential avoidance: essentially a mental tug-of-war where the athlete always loses.

Research from the Australian Institute of Sport shows that over 70% of junior athletes report performance anxiety significantly impacting their game. The traditional approach? “Just think positive!” or “Don’t let it get to you!” These well-meaning but misguided strategies actually make things worse by teaching athletes that normal human emotions are problems to be solved rather than experiences to be navigated.

What Acceptance Actually Means in Sport

Let’s clear up a massive misconception: acceptance doesn’t mean giving up, being passive, or lowering your standards. In the context of sport psychology, acceptance means developing a fundamentally different relationship with your internal experiences: your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations.

Think of acceptance like learning to surf rather than trying to stop the waves. A skilled surfer doesn’t fight the ocean; they read it, respect it, and use its power to their advantage. Similarly, acceptance in sport involves acknowledging uncomfortable feelings without letting them dictate your actions.

Dr. Steven Hayes, the founder of ACT, describes this as psychological flexibility: the ability to stay present and take value-guided action even when your mind is throwing everything it’s got at you. For athletes, this translates to performing optimally regardless of what’s happening internally.

The Science Behind Acceptance in Athletic Performance

A groundbreaking study by Dr. Tobias Lundgren with elite Swedish ice hockey players demonstrated the real-world impact of ACT interventions. Thirty-four junior elite players participated in just four weekly sessions focused on acceptance and values-based action. The results? Significant improvements in objective performance measures including goals, assists, and shots taken, plus better coach ratings for focus and commitment.

What made this study particularly compelling was that the intervention didn’t focus on eliminating anxiety or negative thoughts. Instead, it taught players to accept these experiences while maintaining focus on what mattered most: playing their best hockey.

Australian research has shown similar results across various sports. A 2019 study with junior cricketers found that athletes who learned acceptance-based strategies showed 23% improvement in performance consistency and 31% reduction in performance-related distress compared to traditional mental skills training approaches.

Acceptance in Action: A Young Athlete’s Journey

Let me walk you through what acceptance looks like in practice with Sarah, a 17-year-old netball player from Adelaide I worked with recently (details changed for privacy).

The Situation: Sarah was selected for the state team but found herself paralysed by self-doubt during crucial moments. Her mind would flood with thoughts like “You don’t belong here” and “Everyone’s going to see you’re a fraud.”

The Old Approach: Sarah tried positive self-talk, visualisation, and breathing exercises to eliminate these thoughts. The harder she fought them, the stronger they became.

The Acceptance Approach: We worked on three key strategies:

Noticing without buying: Instead of believing or fighting the thought “You don’t belong here,” Sarah learned to notice it like observing a cloud passing overhead: present but not permanent.
Labelling thoughts: Sarah started recognising these as “doubt thoughts” rather than truths. This simple labelling created psychological distance.
Committed action: We identified Sarah’s core values in netball: teamwork and continuous improvement. Even when doubt thoughts appeared, she could ask herself: “What would someone who values teamwork do right now?”

The result? Sarah didn’t stop having doubt thoughts: they’re normal and human. But she stopped letting them control her performance. Her shooting accuracy improved from 67% to 84% over six weeks, and she reported feeling more present and connected to her teammates.

Practical Acceptance Techniques for Young Athletes

The STOP Technique

When overwhelming thoughts or emotions arise during competition:

Stop what you’re doing
Take a breath and notice what you’re experiencing
Observe the thought or feeling without judgement
Proceed with action aligned to your values

Values Compass Exercise

Help young athletes identify their core sporting values by asking:

“What does sport mean to you beyond winning?”
“What kind of teammate/competitor do you want to be?”
“How do you want to handle setbacks?”

These values become anchor points during difficult moments.

The Passenger on the Bus Metaphor

Imagine you’re the driver of a bus (your performance) and negative thoughts are difficult passengers. You can’t kick them off the bus, but you don’t have to let them drive. Acknowledge their presence (“I notice I’m having the thought that I’m going to fail”) but keep your hands on the wheel.

Building Acceptance Skills in Training

Acceptance isn’t just for game day: it needs to be practised consistently:

Mindful Movement: Encourage athletes to notice physical sensations during training without trying to change them. Feel the burn in muscles, the quickened heartbeat, the trembling hands: all normal responses to challenge.

Thought Defusion Drills: When negative self-talk arises during practice, teach athletes to add “I’m having the thought that…” before the criticism. This creates psychological space.

Values Check-ins: Regularly connect training activities to deeper values. “We’re doing this conditioning drill because we value persistence and supporting our teammates.”

The Acceptance Advantage: Long-term Performance Benefits

Athletes who develop acceptance skills show remarkable resilience across their sporting careers. They bounce back faster from setbacks, maintain motivation through challenging periods, and experience less burnout.

More importantly, these skills transfer beyond sport. Young athletes learn to handle academic pressure, relationship difficulties, and career challenges with the same psychological flexibility they developed on the field.

Common Misconceptions About Acceptance

“Acceptance means I won’t care about winning”: False. Acceptance allows you to compete more freely because you’re not wasting energy fighting internal battles.

“If I accept negative thoughts, they’ll take over”: Research shows the opposite. Fighting thoughts gives them more power; accepting them reduces their intensity.

“This is just being soft”: Acceptance requires tremendous courage and strength. It’s much easier to avoid difficult feelings than to face them head-on.

Moving Forward with Acceptance

Developing acceptance skills takes time and practice, especially for young athletes who’ve spent years trying to control their internal experiences. Start small: perhaps noticing breath during warm-ups or acknowledging pre-game nerves without immediately trying to change them.

Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate uncomfortable thoughts and feelings: they’re part of being human and competing at your best. The goal is to develop a new relationship with these experiences that allows you to perform optimally regardless of what your mind throws at you.

As we continue this ACT series, we’ll explore how acceptance integrates with other components like cognitive defusion and values-based action to create a comprehensive approach to mental performance.

Disclaimer: The information on this page is provided for educational purposes only. It is not personal psychological, medical, or professional advice and should not replace guidance from your own health professional. Individual results may vary. © 2025 RAW Edge Performance. All rights reserved. No unauthorised copying or adaptation without written permission.

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