Your teen athlete used to love their sport. Talked about it at dinner, practised in the backyard, counted the days until the next game. Now they’re quieter. They drag their feet to training. They seem flat after games. One-word answers when you ask how it went.
Something’s shifted. The question is: what?
The two most common explanations parents and coaches reach for are stress and burnout. They look similar on the surface: reduced motivation, lower performance, emotional flatness, withdrawal. But they’re fundamentally different processes, and treating one as though it were the other can make things significantly worse.
Pull Quote 1: “Treating burnout like a motivation problem is one of the most common mistakes adults make with young athletes. What looks like apathy is often depletion.”
Stress Is Not the Problem
This is the most counterintuitive thing about adolescent sport development: stress isn’t inherently harmful. Appropriate stress is a necessary ingredient for growth.
When a young athlete faces a challenge that stretches their current abilities (a tougher opponent, a higher-level competition, a new position) they experience stress. That stress activates a physiological and psychological response designed to mobilise resources. Heart rate increases. Attention narrows. The body prepares for effort.
With adequate recovery and support, they adapt. They get stronger, more skilled, more resilient. The stress was the stimulus; adaptation was the growth.
This is the normal cycle of athletic development: challenge, stress response, recovery, adaptation. It’s uncomfortable. It’s supposed to be.
Burnout Is a Different Process
Burnout occurs when the stress-recovery cycle breaks down. Challenges continue; recovery doesn’t. Over time, the athlete’s resources deplete faster than they can be restored. The result isn’t a temporary dip in motivation; it’s a fundamental shift in the athlete’s relationship with their sport.
The three hallmarks of sport burnout in adolescents:
- Emotional and physical exhaustion that doesn’t resolve with normal rest
- Reduced sense of accomplishment : the athlete stops feeling capable or competent regardless of actual results
- Devaluation of sport : beginning to question whether their sport matters to them at all, often with resentment toward training, coaches, or competition
Burnout isn’t a bad week. It develops over weeks and months of chronic imbalance between demand and recovery. And it often has less to do with training volume and more to do with the athlete’s psychological relationship to their sport.
The ACT Lens: Away Moves vs Toward Moves
In ACT, every behaviour can be understood as either a toward move (moving toward something the person values) or an away move (moving away from something uncomfortable). Both involve action. The difference is direction (Hayes et al., 2006).
Applying this lens to a teen athlete’s behaviour reveals a critical distinction:
Away moves under chronic stress = burnout risk. The athlete is withdrawing or avoiding not because they’ve chosen a different direction, but because continuing has become intolerable. They’re not moving toward something; they’re escaping.
Away move examples:
- Consistently “forgetting” gear or asking to skip training
- Going through the motions without engagement
- Avoiding sport conversations with parents or coaches
- Increased irritability before or after training
- Withdrawing from teammates socially
Toward moves under stress = healthy adaptation. The athlete is making deliberate choices aligned with something they value, even if uncomfortable. They might be pulling back, but they’re pulling toward something, not running from something.
Toward move examples:
- Choosing rest because they recognise they need recovery (not avoidance)
- Expressing they want to try a different sport or position (moving toward a new interest)
- Asking for help or talking honestly about their experience
- Setting limits on training volume because they value long-term sustainability
The same behaviour (missing a training session) can be a toward move or an away move. The key question isn’t “what are they doing?” but “what are they moving toward or away from?”
Pull Quote 2: “The same behaviour can be an away move or a toward move. It depends on what’s driving it, not what it looks like from the outside.”
Free resource: The RAW Edge Self-Check gives athletes and performers a baseline read on their mental fitness, including patterns that may signal burnout risk. [Download free at rawedge.au/self-check]
Try This: The Direction Check-In
Five minutes. Works over dinner, in the car, or after training.
Question 1: “What’s one thing about your sport that still matters to you?”
Identifies whether the athlete’s values around sport are still active. If they can name something (teammates, the feeling of competing, improving a specific skill) the values are present. If they can’t identify anything that still matters, that’s a signal worth taking seriously.
Question 2: “When you think about training this week, are you more pulled toward something or pushed away from something?”
Listen for direction. “I don’t want to go because I’m tired of it” (away) sounds different from “I don’t want to go because I want to rest for Saturday” (toward).
What the answers tell you:
- Values active + toward moves = Normal stress. Support recovery.
- Values active + away moves = Early burnout warning. Increase recovery. Open a conversation.
- Values fading + away moves = High burnout risk. This athlete needs a genuine conversation about what they want, not a speech about pushing through.
The critical mistake adults make with burnout is treating it like a motivation problem. “You just need to push through.” “Remember why you started.” These responses assume the athlete is choosing not to engage. In reality, their capacity to engage has been depleted. What they need isn’t more encouragement; it’s space, recovery, and permission to reconnect with what they value about sport on their own terms.
Pull Quote 3: “When capacity has been depleted, what the athlete needs isn’t more encouragement. It’s space, recovery, and permission to reconnect.”
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if my athlete needs a break or needs to push through?
Look at the direction of their behaviour. Consistent away moves across sport, school, and relationships suggest depletion. If you’re genuinely unsure, a conversation with a registered psychologist or your GP is a reasonable next step.
Can mental fitness training help prevent burnout?
Yes. Research on ACT in youth sport supports the value of helping young athletes develop awareness of their own patterns , specifically the difference between valued action and avoidance, as a protective factor (Hayes et al., 2006; Reinebo et al., 2024). Mental fitness training builds that awareness early, before depletion sets in.
My athlete says they still love their sport but their behaviour says otherwise. What’s going on?
Ambivalence is common in early burnout. The athlete may still value their sport at some level but feel unable to access that connection because they’re depleted. Don’t dismiss what they say, but pay attention to behavioural patterns over time.
References
Hayes, S. C., Luoma, J. B., Bond, F. W., Masuda, A., & Lillis, J. (2006). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: Model, processes and outcomes. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 44(1), 1-25. Full reference at rawedge.au/research
Reinebo, G. et al. (2024). Internet-based acceptance and commitment training in ice hockey players. Frontiers in Sports and Active Living, 6, 1297631. Full reference at rawedge.au/research
Aaron Williams is an AHPRA-registered psychologist (PSY0002297677) and the founder of RAW Edge Performance. He works with athletes and performers across sport, performing arts, and high-performance environments. This content is educational and does not constitute clinical advice.